On Wednesday morning (6/8/08) Pramod comes up and says - you know Shalini its the S$8 million lottery draw on Friday. The chinese believe 8th being the lucky number and its 8 of August (another 8) and year being 2008 (another 8). So its a lucky day and there is a $8 million prize. You have to buy!!
I got the bug.. i actually did. I gathered 9 of my colleagues - conned them into giving me $7 each and bought 18 tickets at $3.50 a piece. I met Parul for lunch and conned her into buying 6 more tickets.
And i started dreaming. All i want is 500K, no need for millions. I want to do my europe tour with the kids, i want to pay back my loan for the kitchen reno, i want to donate 100K and finance one underprivileged kid's education, i want to - i want to - i want to. I just keep building castles in the air. For 2 days.
On Fri nite, the day of the draw, i was one the 1st to check whether i won. Lo behold - my castles burst. Deep down i knew i would never win - its a chance in a million. So why am i disappointed and upset? Why am I blaming god for not giving me luck?
Is it fair? As a muslim, the money earned from lucky draw/toto is haram. So why am I blaming god?
Life has always been unfair to me - my dysfunctional family, my divorce, my job, my surgery last year, sheens problems with bhabhi, nisha's family problems, my both brothers personal problems. It just goes on and never ends!
Is it?
- My dysfunctional family has always been there when i needed them. Always.
- I have fantastic "outlaws" from the divorce. Our relationship of 14 years is the best and I can count on them everytime, whenever i need them.
- Its has been 16 years since i joined the work force. And I always had fun. Even today and I have made tons of good friends over the years. Ask anyone about Shalini and all they say is - she's always playing games in the office and getting paid for it.
- My surgery gave me one thing - my FRIENDS - my extended family. Everyone prayed, called, and were there for me this past 1 year.
- Kids are resilient. They will face problems in their lives. How long will i shelter them. I just have to be there when they need me and I promise i will be there.
- My brothers are old enough to know what they are doing. They know what is right and what is wrong. Why do I have to worry about them?
Now - after listing down these points, life looks great and fair.
Life is a journey and I have enough people to ride it out with. I am not alone and I have lots to be grateful for.
Will I buy toto again? I might and I will try again for the $8 million. Maybe next time I will be lucky.
Umeed pe dunia kayam hai!
shalini
